October 7th, 2003


"Angst in my Pants"

That album title had been in my head for a few days. I couldn't remember who's it was. A quick Internet search turned up the group Sparks. Ah yes. My mind drifted back to the early '80's. *starts humming "Cool Places"*

PFD hit me yesterday afternoon like I knew it eventually would. It was a nagging, indescribable saddness. It was a feeling of lonliness and emptiness that I knew was bullshit, but couldn't shake it. I got all melancholy and shit. Pictures of that poor tiger in Harlem made me want to cry. I sat on the patio reading the paper when the phone rang. It was albear. Just hearing his voice was a like a breeze that cleared all of the black clouds that had gathered in my head. I realized that I needed more positive reinforcment, so I hit the computer. I stood there as a wave of chat requests came pouring in over me. I was smothered by furry love. It was just what the doctor ordered. Thank you all that contacted me. I wanted to be a chat slut of the highest degree. I couldn't get enough of it. I must have idled on one furiend who eventually asked the inevitable question, "How many windows do you have open?" I didn't have a clue. I had to stop and count. 11?!? Damn! How did that happen?

I was also contacted out of the blue by some Pagan lass. I had no idea who she was, but she must have thought I had some great insight. *shrugs* I pretty much have given up on any sort of religion, even paganism. No ceremonies, no meditation, no prayer or chants. Just living my life and enjoying it to its fullest while thanking whatever power that is for the opportunity. I just let the converstaion with her fade off into idleness.

I also had "warning wars" with furrysparkles. We lob warnings back and forth at each other. Once he linked to my computer, however, he couldn't do it. Ha ha! Little goody two shoes! Little goody two shoes! Little goody two shoes! Yes, he spent most of the night sending me "Army of Darkness" audio clips.

I was pretty hammered by the time I was ready for bed. I then couldn't fall back asleep after I woke up at 4. So I hit the computer again to tie up some loose ends from the night before. I got a morning happiness boost with a short chat with berin. Good stuff. So now....back to the grindstone.
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